The Crack Files: Subs, Trains, and Automobiles?

I think that in some sort of crazy way I am fascinated by the crack heads of this nation, especially the one's in New York City. It's probably because in NYC, poverty is right smack in your face and the majority of native New Yorkers are jaded by the thousands of crack heads and their shenanigans, that they just ignore it...oh not me! I love witnessing, sharing, and hearing other people's stories about their encounters with the wacko's of the world. So I give you today my fabulous Vanity Pages readers (all 10 of you, I mean 12-I noticed we have some new readers...glad to have you, by the way) 3 short stories, that take place on the train, in the subway station, and in an automobile...

CASE 1: Early morning on the train

So, I had to be at work very early on a Saturday morning for an event and I was incredibly tired. I went out that night, had only 2 hours of sleep, not to mention I was still tipsy. I get on the train and I decide to close my eyes until my stop just to get a few extra minutes of rest. I feel something on my foot. And, I'm thinking to myself, "I know this isn't a grown person stepping on my foot? It has to be a little kid, but it's too damn early..." I open my eyes and BAM! There he is! A crackhead looking at me dead in the eye with a "Bitch move your feet out the way" type of look. Naturally, I rolled my eyes at him like he was crazy...well he actually was, so I just left it at an eye roll because there's no telling what these crack heads will do. And, I am one of 3 people (including the crackhead) in this particular subway car. So I commenced to closing my eyes again after he walked away as if he was going to walk through to the next subway car-I thought I was in the clear. Next, I heard slurping from an aluminum can...and then the crumbling of that same can, at that moment I think to myself, "I know this nigga ain't about to throw this can at me?!" The next thing I know, I open my eyes and this ass hole throws the sprite can at ME!!! WHAT??!! Then he takes his cracky ass to the next car! WTF??

CASE 2: The Subway Sandwich

My dear friend Eddie Nicole was with her boyfriend in the subway station and they see a typical homeless/crackhead on the platform with his bags looking hungry and tired-he was asleep (or at least he looked like he was). She had a sandwich from subway and didn't want the rest. Mr. HomelessCrackhead guy looked like he could use a bite, so Eddie, being the generous person she is thought she would be a good Samaritan and give him the rest of her Sub. She laid it next to him and walked off feeling like she did her good deed for the day. Little did she know, Mr. HomelessCrackhead guy wasn't feeling her sandwich. As a matter of fact, he felt like she should know it, so a couple of seconds after Eddie walked off feeling good about herself, she felt a massive thump to the back of her head!!! The bastard threw the damn sub at her!! LMAO! I guess his message was, keep your sandwich Bitch, give me the money!!!

CASE 3: The Automobile
Another one of my dear friends in Houston shared an unfortunate story with me the other day. Her car was broken into. I was sad to hear about it because in these particular situations, one typically gets their fancy shmancy radio/cd/ipod player stolen or something else of value. On the contrary, her story was worst than that. She walks to her car during her lunch break and the window is broken. Immediately she thinks, "Oh no! I left my radio face on, and my Nike bag is in there with my work out clothes! Oh shit, I just bought some new shoes , they are in the bag too!" And, she continues to think of the valuables she left in her car all at this moment. She opens the door, and sees that all of the items in the gym bag are removed from the bag. Sprawled around the back seat of the car. "But, wait! Everything is still in here, this is crazy," she thought. Well guess what folks? All that was missing was her cigarette lighter and the gym bag! What kind of shit is that?! Now, I'm glad that all of her belongings were there, but this theft is screaming crackhead! All he took was a bag and a lighter!

Until next time...

Lady A